I like walking. Which is fortunate as my position as unpaid intern involves a fair bit of it. "Please drop this tape stock off at 37th Street", "Please pick up this battery from 24th", and as long as the stuff is carryable then I will walk rather than take a cab. I like it because this gives me a great view of Manhattan and helps me learn the lay of the land. I get to exercise and not being on public transport is a plus for a myriad of reasons (reasons relating to economics, the environment, my own health!).
I have always explored the surrounding area whenever I start a new job. It was the same in London, every lunch break would have me walk in a different direction to see what was what. What shops are around? Where is the nearest store if I need a Coke? What are the best local lunch spots? It's because I am inquisitive, and I like to know what I can get to eat...and it makes the most of the time I get out of the office. I just enjoy walking about. You get to see what other people are up to. Where are they are going? Where have they come from? Why would you wear that hat? I think that my ideal job would be walking and getting paid for it. Up and down the avenues, zigzagging across the streets. There is a great freedom to just being able to walk. Mum always says that see can never imagine me working in an office and you know what she is right (mothers are right a good 95% of the time...as much as we like to think otherwise). So this has me thinking about how I can get paid to walk, maybe I can turn this into one of those books where someone does something a bit out of the ordinary for an entire year and retells that year in writing with much hilarity.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Video games killed the radio games star!?!?!?!!?
No that title would never have worked. The Buggles were right to reject it.
Video games have been a large portion of my life and that portion is beginning to reduce in size, like a deflating balloon. I started gaming at about seven when my Dad bought the family an Atari. I have since owned a Super Nintendo, numerous PCs, Playstation, Nintendo GBA, Playstation 2 (two, one in the US and one in England), Nintendo DS, X-Box 360, and a Nintendo Wii. I have played games with a joystick, keyboard, mouse, controller, Wii controller, a plastic guitar on systems using disks, CDs, DVDs, cartridges, even games I downloaded! And I do wonder what it has all brought me?
I guess I do have pretty good hand eye coordination (as seen by my peeling of a sweet potato with a kitchen knife, "Look ma 10 fingers!"). And I do pick things up quite quickly which I attribute to the numerous different control systems I have learned over the years. But now I do find my self wanting to play less and less and this at a time where the technology is getting more powerful and the games are looking better and better. And the games I choose to play have changed. I used to play sports games nearly all the time (soccer, football, tennis, golf, you name it I have played a pixellated version of it), this was the closest I could get to the professional level. I lived out my dreams through the computer screen, until about five years ago I always thought that if I lost a bit of weight and just practiced that I could make it, that the natural talent was there! Mainly at soccer but now I am more realistic. At 28 most professionals are younger than me, although I do still think that give me one year at either pool or darts and I would get pretty darn good. As my interest in sport has dwindled my love of film has grown. Now I prefer playing games of a more cinematic nature, now I shoot zombies not the ball, I leap across rooftops not over hurdles. I want a story wrapped up with scenarios you can only experience in movies, or if you are a member of the criminal fraternity!
I guess that maybe I am growing up? But games are not just for kids, I was a kid when I started but I am part of the first generation of gamers, a generation who has a chance to play games throughout their entire lives. I bet in 40 years there will be plenty of octogenarians playing Wii 12 (or Wiiiiiiiiiiiii).
I think my big fear is the time that is stolen by video gaming. You can lose yourself for hours in a game and have no recollection of what has happened, what the time is or even where you are. I can recall sessions of gaming at university where I didn't blink for about 8 hours! And now as I approach my thirties I am conscious of what I want to achieve in my life and what it will take. I need to be creative on a daily basis. I can't afford to lose an entire weekend to a world where I'm in control of a pirate, a gangster or a very fast car. I need to be lucid and doing stuff that advances me and will cross over into my work life. Being funny, writing, filming. Whatever it takes I need to be doing it. Games are just another form of entertainment in which people lose themselves which is perfectly acceptable but it has had a control over me which I have to overcome other wise I will wind up at forty-five wondering how do I get off level 1?
Or maybe I just need to get some new games...to Best Buy!
Video games have been a large portion of my life and that portion is beginning to reduce in size, like a deflating balloon. I started gaming at about seven when my Dad bought the family an Atari. I have since owned a Super Nintendo, numerous PCs, Playstation, Nintendo GBA, Playstation 2 (two, one in the US and one in England), Nintendo DS, X-Box 360, and a Nintendo Wii. I have played games with a joystick, keyboard, mouse, controller, Wii controller, a plastic guitar on systems using disks, CDs, DVDs, cartridges, even games I downloaded! And I do wonder what it has all brought me?
I guess I do have pretty good hand eye coordination (as seen by my peeling of a sweet potato with a kitchen knife, "Look ma 10 fingers!"). And I do pick things up quite quickly which I attribute to the numerous different control systems I have learned over the years. But now I do find my self wanting to play less and less and this at a time where the technology is getting more powerful and the games are looking better and better. And the games I choose to play have changed. I used to play sports games nearly all the time (soccer, football, tennis, golf, you name it I have played a pixellated version of it), this was the closest I could get to the professional level. I lived out my dreams through the computer screen, until about five years ago I always thought that if I lost a bit of weight and just practiced that I could make it, that the natural talent was there! Mainly at soccer but now I am more realistic. At 28 most professionals are younger than me, although I do still think that give me one year at either pool or darts and I would get pretty darn good. As my interest in sport has dwindled my love of film has grown. Now I prefer playing games of a more cinematic nature, now I shoot zombies not the ball, I leap across rooftops not over hurdles. I want a story wrapped up with scenarios you can only experience in movies, or if you are a member of the criminal fraternity!
I guess that maybe I am growing up? But games are not just for kids, I was a kid when I started but I am part of the first generation of gamers, a generation who has a chance to play games throughout their entire lives. I bet in 40 years there will be plenty of octogenarians playing Wii 12 (or Wiiiiiiiiiiiii).
I think my big fear is the time that is stolen by video gaming. You can lose yourself for hours in a game and have no recollection of what has happened, what the time is or even where you are. I can recall sessions of gaming at university where I didn't blink for about 8 hours! And now as I approach my thirties I am conscious of what I want to achieve in my life and what it will take. I need to be creative on a daily basis. I can't afford to lose an entire weekend to a world where I'm in control of a pirate, a gangster or a very fast car. I need to be lucid and doing stuff that advances me and will cross over into my work life. Being funny, writing, filming. Whatever it takes I need to be doing it. Games are just another form of entertainment in which people lose themselves which is perfectly acceptable but it has had a control over me which I have to overcome other wise I will wind up at forty-five wondering how do I get off level 1?
Or maybe I just need to get some new games...to Best Buy!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
The Oscars
So The Oscars are on tonight and awards will be handed out to the great and good of Hollywood who have been either great or good in a selection of last year's movies. The Oscars are an annual event but here are some little known facts about the awards:
1. The Oscars were started in 1774 by a soothsayer, Oscar Von Waffle, who foresaw the Lumiere Brother's invention. Oscar was seen as a better name for an award given for greatness in an as-of-yet-created medium than a Von Waffle. Oscar Von Waffle was later burned at the stake.
2. The Oscar statues given to the winners are made of chocolate and are wrapped in gold leaf. Meryl Streep has eaten at least half of her awards.
3. Anna Paquin won an Oscar at the age of 11, or so it was believed. She was actually 18 years old when she won but was just very small!
4. Oscar speeches are famously kept to but a few minutes in length as the music kicks in whenever an overly grateful recipient wants to thank everyone s/he knows. This practice was famously introduced back in 1953 after Humphrey Bogart, after winning for The African Queen, spoke for over 2 hours!
5. No dog has ever won an Oscar, although walruses have claimed three statues.
6. Finally winning an Oscar, in 2007 for The Departed, after being nominated six times previously Martin Scorsese described himself as chuffed!
7. Jack Nicholson wears his sunglasses every year to the awards so that he can have a nap if he gets bored.
8. The Oscars are quite obnoxious as it really is a bit much lauded all these incredibly attractive, talented millionaires. But yet we watch.
9. No Paraguayan actor has ever won, been nominated or even attended The Oscars. In fact no Paraguayan has ever heard of The Oscars.
10. The Oscars are on now so I have to go.
1. The Oscars were started in 1774 by a soothsayer, Oscar Von Waffle, who foresaw the Lumiere Brother's invention. Oscar was seen as a better name for an award given for greatness in an as-of-yet-created medium than a Von Waffle. Oscar Von Waffle was later burned at the stake.
2. The Oscar statues given to the winners are made of chocolate and are wrapped in gold leaf. Meryl Streep has eaten at least half of her awards.
3. Anna Paquin won an Oscar at the age of 11, or so it was believed. She was actually 18 years old when she won but was just very small!
4. Oscar speeches are famously kept to but a few minutes in length as the music kicks in whenever an overly grateful recipient wants to thank everyone s/he knows. This practice was famously introduced back in 1953 after Humphrey Bogart, after winning for The African Queen, spoke for over 2 hours!
5. No dog has ever won an Oscar, although walruses have claimed three statues.
6. Finally winning an Oscar, in 2007 for The Departed, after being nominated six times previously Martin Scorsese described himself as chuffed!
7. Jack Nicholson wears his sunglasses every year to the awards so that he can have a nap if he gets bored.
8. The Oscars are quite obnoxious as it really is a bit much lauded all these incredibly attractive, talented millionaires. But yet we watch.
9. No Paraguayan actor has ever won, been nominated or even attended The Oscars. In fact no Paraguayan has ever heard of The Oscars.
10. The Oscars are on now so I have to go.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Four word film reviews
This is a funny website, www.fwfr.com. It is not one of those sites that you lose yourself in for hours but 15 minutes can go by and you have not noticed it but you feel warm inside. Anywho I had a idea for a four word film review for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button which Bec and I saw last week.
Forrest Gump minus retardation.
The film's similarity to Forrest Gump, that I had seen, was confirmed when I read the Empire review and Ian Freer mentioned it. Lets see what else I can come up with.
The Great Escape - Steve McQueen, enough said!
Aliens - Like Alien but plural.
Tropic Thunder - Downey Jr steals show.
Aliens vs Predator: Requiem - Studio rapes both franchises.
This is all I can come up with at the moment but this topic may be returned to at a later date.
Forrest Gump minus retardation.
The film's similarity to Forrest Gump, that I had seen, was confirmed when I read the Empire review and Ian Freer mentioned it. Lets see what else I can come up with.
The Great Escape - Steve McQueen, enough said!
Aliens - Like Alien but plural.
Tropic Thunder - Downey Jr steals show.
Aliens vs Predator: Requiem - Studio rapes both franchises.
This is all I can come up with at the moment but this topic may be returned to at a later date.
Friday, February 20, 2009
A questionnaire
Back in London when I worked at MPSGI me and a colleague used to ask each other questions, via e-mail, to make the days go quicker. This was 2006 and now I fancy answering my own questions:
1. Northampton or Southampton? - I have been to neither, well I drove through Northampton once. I am going for Northampton as it contains the word North and I am from the North of England. Although I am sure Southampton is actually nicer than its northern equivalent.
2. Have you ever growled at anyone in public? - No but I wish I could say yes. Maybe I will do that next time someone gets in my way.
3. Would you rather win a Grammy or an Oscar? - I'm a movie fan who likes to act a bit so I would want to grab a golden statue. Plus I can't play music so a Grammy is out of the question, unless they give them out for Guitar Hero (even then I struggle on Medium difficulty).
4. Coco-pops or Frosties? - A tough one this. I never feel Coco-pops are that chocolaty so I will say Frosties. Maybe I should try mixing both but the result would most likely be a diabetic coma.
5. Favourite European Capital City other than London? - Paris, or Gay Paris, or the smelly capital of France. Bec and I love this place and I would like to live there one day. I should never have given up French at 13 to study German. Merde!
6. Who invented the lift? - Mr Otis. He was from Chicago, his name can be seen in many of the world's lifts (or elevators) as Otis is a leading purveyor of human lifting systems.
7. In a post-apocalyptic world you are a member of a motley crew of misfits trying to save the world against…zombies, vampires, aliens or walking plants? Zombies because a true zombie can be outrun (rage victims are not strictly zombies). Vampires fly after you and bite you, aliens probe you and walking plants make you blind.
8. Do you believe the Great Wall of China can be seen from space? - People always say that it can be but it can't as it is too thin. Seeing it from space would be like looking at a piece of string from the top of The Empire State Building (this is an unproven ratio that I have just made up so please don't quote me).
9. Morecombe and Wise or Two Ronnies? - Two classic British comedy duos from the 70s and on. Hard to choose, the edge goes to Morecombe and Wise.
10. In the movie of your life who plays you? - I like this question that I created myself. It would have to be someone who has acting chops but who can also bring the funny. Maybe Sam Rockwell or Steve Carrell would be good. I hope my life story would be full of mirth.
11. Do you say pro-ven or pru-ven? - Proven should be said pru-ven not pro-ven! This is one of life's imperative lessons. It really pigs me off when people say pro-ven.
12. Would sterilization work as a deterrent to anti-social behaviour? - Fo shiz! It would certainly help we just have not had the leaders to stand behind such a radical program that clearly breaks every human right code in the Big Book of Human Rights. But come one we have all walked past people on the street, either with manky children in tow or who you can tell will produce manky progeny, and thought to ourselves "If only I had Superman's heat vision I could fix them right now".
13. Favourite planet? - Uranus for comedy value but I have always had a soft spot for Neptune.
14. Favourite element on the periodic table - A tough one indeed. Argon has its perks as does Bismuth. I like the elements near the end with stupid names like Americium or Dysprosium. I pass on this question, its like being asked which of your kids you like best.
15. Did you ever buy a poster from Athena? If so which one? - I am sure I did but it wasn't the lady tennis player scratching her arse. Or any of those magic eye pictures to which people would always say "Oh yes I see the dolphin" to wit I say "There was no dolphin". You only way you were seeing a dolphin was if you were on LSD.
16. Favourite Simpson character who isn’t a Simpson? - Good question Olly, why there are so many...I would have to say...I will give a top 3 (in no particular order) Prof. Frink, Chief Wiggum and Lenny.
17. Continent Excluding Antarctica you would least like to visit? - Probably Africa, at least Asia has Japan.
18. Worst movie seen at the cinema? - Wild Wild West was horrid but even worse was Hurlyburly, a David Mamet play. A film with a superb cast but completely wasted on bilge.
19. Oxford or Cambridge? - Oxford, we lived there and I have never been to Cambridge.
20. Do holiday snaps have to have the tourist in them? - No they do not! I believe you went to the Taj Mahal because you are showing me a picture taken there, you don't have to stand there pretending to lean on it when in fact you are 200 metres away. I don't believe that you would have made up a story about being there and found any old picture to use as evidence.
21. You have to make a sequel to a film, what do you sequelise? - Another Princess Bride would be a riot but the death of Andre the Giant leaves a big hole, literally! If not that then maybe Remains of the Day 2!!!
22. Who would be your wresting alter-ego? - The Vanishing Coward! See him duck, see him evade, see him run out of the ring.
23. I neither like the name flip-flop or the flip-flop itself. Is there something which you do like but hate the name of or vice-versa? - Tiffin, a British cake is lovely but the saying of its name is like nails down a chalkboard.
74%. Yes a C!
1. Northampton or Southampton? - I have been to neither, well I drove through Northampton once. I am going for Northampton as it contains the word North and I am from the North of England. Although I am sure Southampton is actually nicer than its northern equivalent.
2. Have you ever growled at anyone in public? - No but I wish I could say yes. Maybe I will do that next time someone gets in my way.
3. Would you rather win a Grammy or an Oscar? - I'm a movie fan who likes to act a bit so I would want to grab a golden statue. Plus I can't play music so a Grammy is out of the question, unless they give them out for Guitar Hero (even then I struggle on Medium difficulty).
4. Coco-pops or Frosties? - A tough one this. I never feel Coco-pops are that chocolaty so I will say Frosties. Maybe I should try mixing both but the result would most likely be a diabetic coma.
5. Favourite European Capital City other than London? - Paris, or Gay Paris, or the smelly capital of France. Bec and I love this place and I would like to live there one day. I should never have given up French at 13 to study German. Merde!
6. Who invented the lift? - Mr Otis. He was from Chicago, his name can be seen in many of the world's lifts (or elevators) as Otis is a leading purveyor of human lifting systems.
7. In a post-apocalyptic world you are a member of a motley crew of misfits trying to save the world against…zombies, vampires, aliens or walking plants? Zombies because a true zombie can be outrun (rage victims are not strictly zombies). Vampires fly after you and bite you, aliens probe you and walking plants make you blind.
8. Do you believe the Great Wall of China can be seen from space? - People always say that it can be but it can't as it is too thin. Seeing it from space would be like looking at a piece of string from the top of The Empire State Building (this is an unproven ratio that I have just made up so please don't quote me).
9. Morecombe and Wise or Two Ronnies? - Two classic British comedy duos from the 70s and on. Hard to choose, the edge goes to Morecombe and Wise.
10. In the movie of your life who plays you? - I like this question that I created myself. It would have to be someone who has acting chops but who can also bring the funny. Maybe Sam Rockwell or Steve Carrell would be good. I hope my life story would be full of mirth.
11. Do you say pro-ven or pru-ven? - Proven should be said pru-ven not pro-ven! This is one of life's imperative lessons. It really pigs me off when people say pro-ven.
12. Would sterilization work as a deterrent to anti-social behaviour? - Fo shiz! It would certainly help we just have not had the leaders to stand behind such a radical program that clearly breaks every human right code in the Big Book of Human Rights. But come one we have all walked past people on the street, either with manky children in tow or who you can tell will produce manky progeny, and thought to ourselves "If only I had Superman's heat vision I could fix them right now".
13. Favourite planet? - Uranus for comedy value but I have always had a soft spot for Neptune.
14. Favourite element on the periodic table - A tough one indeed. Argon has its perks as does Bismuth. I like the elements near the end with stupid names like Americium or Dysprosium. I pass on this question, its like being asked which of your kids you like best.
15. Did you ever buy a poster from Athena? If so which one? - I am sure I did but it wasn't the lady tennis player scratching her arse. Or any of those magic eye pictures to which people would always say "Oh yes I see the dolphin" to wit I say "There was no dolphin". You only way you were seeing a dolphin was if you were on LSD.
16. Favourite Simpson character who isn’t a Simpson? - Good question Olly, why there are so many...I would have to say...I will give a top 3 (in no particular order) Prof. Frink, Chief Wiggum and Lenny.
17. Continent Excluding Antarctica you would least like to visit? - Probably Africa, at least Asia has Japan.
18. Worst movie seen at the cinema? - Wild Wild West was horrid but even worse was Hurlyburly, a David Mamet play. A film with a superb cast but completely wasted on bilge.
19. Oxford or Cambridge? - Oxford, we lived there and I have never been to Cambridge.
20. Do holiday snaps have to have the tourist in them? - No they do not! I believe you went to the Taj Mahal because you are showing me a picture taken there, you don't have to stand there pretending to lean on it when in fact you are 200 metres away. I don't believe that you would have made up a story about being there and found any old picture to use as evidence.
21. You have to make a sequel to a film, what do you sequelise? - Another Princess Bride would be a riot but the death of Andre the Giant leaves a big hole, literally! If not that then maybe Remains of the Day 2!!!
22. Who would be your wresting alter-ego? - The Vanishing Coward! See him duck, see him evade, see him run out of the ring.
23. I neither like the name flip-flop or the flip-flop itself. Is there something which you do like but hate the name of or vice-versa? - Tiffin, a British cake is lovely but the saying of its name is like nails down a chalkboard.
74%. Yes a C!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Things that I believed as a child
One of the greatest things about growing up is the accumulation of knowledge that accompanies the changes that take you from a 10 lb baby who just wants to drink milk and poop to a 200+ lb man who still likes milk as long as its mixed with Lucky Charms, and who still poops. You learn things through observing others, while other knowledge is acquired through direct action. For example telling a woman to keep her hair on does not result in a positive response if that woman is your mother and not drying your hands properly can result in you losing grip on your new purple, dinosaur shaped piggy bank which you inexplicably took to the bathroom for no other reason than the fact you were so enamored with it. I can still remember my levels of distress as I picked up the pieces off the floor.
I think it is funny to look back on the things that you believed as a child but which were totally untrue:
1. I believed that the world was black and white until the 1960s. This made sense because everything on TV from the 60s or earlier was monochrome. I don't know when I learned that this was not the case but I like to imagine a world where color just appeared one day and finally a small percentage of the population were able to be colorblind. Thinking about colors reminds me of the times when I would be deep in thought about whether what I saw as a color was the same as what the next person saw? This has never been answered, regardless of what color you see if you are told it is red will you forever call it red, even if it is blue? This is very confusing for a child, and it still is for a manchild such as myself.
2. I thought that for a man to impregnate a women he had to wee in her. This seems fair because for the first 10-13 years of your life only one fluid is coming out of your man bits. This does bring into question the sex education I received because I clearly knew the act that was taking place I just had no concept of the processes involved. I guess you could say I knew that people liked cupcakes but ignorant of the fact that making them needs flour! (Does that analogy work?)
3. I believed that calculators had to have every answer to every sum manually typed in. Obviously this raised enormous questions about the man hours involved and the knowledge required to correctly input the solutions to really large sums. I guess once I learned of the wonders of computer chips this gap in my knowledge was filled but for a few years I believed that calculator engineers at Casio and T.I. (Texas Instruments not the rapper) were the smartest guys in the world.
Oh the naivety of youth.
I think it is funny to look back on the things that you believed as a child but which were totally untrue:
1. I believed that the world was black and white until the 1960s. This made sense because everything on TV from the 60s or earlier was monochrome. I don't know when I learned that this was not the case but I like to imagine a world where color just appeared one day and finally a small percentage of the population were able to be colorblind. Thinking about colors reminds me of the times when I would be deep in thought about whether what I saw as a color was the same as what the next person saw? This has never been answered, regardless of what color you see if you are told it is red will you forever call it red, even if it is blue? This is very confusing for a child, and it still is for a manchild such as myself.
2. I thought that for a man to impregnate a women he had to wee in her. This seems fair because for the first 10-13 years of your life only one fluid is coming out of your man bits. This does bring into question the sex education I received because I clearly knew the act that was taking place I just had no concept of the processes involved. I guess you could say I knew that people liked cupcakes but ignorant of the fact that making them needs flour! (Does that analogy work?)
3. I believed that calculators had to have every answer to every sum manually typed in. Obviously this raised enormous questions about the man hours involved and the knowledge required to correctly input the solutions to really large sums. I guess once I learned of the wonders of computer chips this gap in my knowledge was filled but for a few years I believed that calculator engineers at Casio and T.I. (Texas Instruments not the rapper) were the smartest guys in the world.
Oh the naivety of youth.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Proud of my beloved Owls
The story coming out of Hillsborough, the ground of my football team Sheffield Wednesday, is that for the next two years the sponsorship on our shirt will be donated to the Sheffield Children's Hospital. This move will obviously cost the club a few hundred thousand pounds but it is a great move for a couple of reasons:
1. Our recent sponsors have been crap (barring the genius of Chupa Chups we have had a casino and an Internet company in recent years neither of which were known by anybody).
2. Seriously this is a great boost to a local charity/organisation that is of vital importance to the city of Sheffield and the health of its kids.
I spent a lot more time at the hospital than I would have wished as a child. They helped pull a button/pin out of my lip (I was about four but even at that age I think I realised what I was doing was stupid), stopped the bleeding after I put my hand through glass door (chasing my sister and her friend), and mended both a broken thumb (I didn't save a shot during a football game, "I let a goal in and break my thumb? That sucks!" and little finger (doing a power slide on my knees in the school hall, I am convinced all the girls watching were blown away). I think that this move is good for all concerned, it gets exposure for Wednesday, during a time when we could all forgive the club for making as much money as they can, who have chosen an altruistic path. But most important is that a Sheffield institution gets some appreciation, the accolades, for decades of hard work. I for one will be buying the new shirt.
1. Our recent sponsors have been crap (barring the genius of Chupa Chups we have had a casino and an Internet company in recent years neither of which were known by anybody).
2. Seriously this is a great boost to a local charity/organisation that is of vital importance to the city of Sheffield and the health of its kids.
I spent a lot more time at the hospital than I would have wished as a child. They helped pull a button/pin out of my lip (I was about four but even at that age I think I realised what I was doing was stupid), stopped the bleeding after I put my hand through glass door (chasing my sister and her friend), and mended both a broken thumb (I didn't save a shot during a football game, "I let a goal in and break my thumb? That sucks!" and little finger (doing a power slide on my knees in the school hall, I am convinced all the girls watching were blown away). I think that this move is good for all concerned, it gets exposure for Wednesday, during a time when we could all forgive the club for making as much money as they can, who have chosen an altruistic path. But most important is that a Sheffield institution gets some appreciation, the accolades, for decades of hard work. I for one will be buying the new shirt.
Monday, February 9, 2009
I assume the "base" comes from "freebase"?
Because of the drugs you see! I am referring to baseball and today's confession, to yesterday's hot story. Alex Rodriguez (New York Yankee Third Baseman) admitted that he did take steroids between 2001-3. And that he did lie about it during a TV interview. Oh the uproar!
What do people expect? Baseball is clearly, and has been for some time, riddled with players who have used steroids to enhance their abilities. Like a superhero power but one that makes your dick shrivel up. It is no surprise that people want to be stronger, quicker, recover faster from injury, these things can make the difference between $5 and $20 million a year. And don't get me started on homers, we all know that chicks dig the long ball.
Rodriguez should be upset with himself. He was arguably the best player in baseball and lots of people adore him (lots of people also hate him and they are licking their lips about this revelation) and he will no doubt lose some of his endorsements, fans, and a surefire place in the Hall of Fame. But he must be pissed with the MLB. The results of the test he failed were supposed to be anonymous and A-Rod was tested (alongside 103 other players) just so that the authorities would know the percentages of players using. No one was supposed to be punished!
But now A-Rod will be punished. He should lose some credibility because I think that sports should be played on even playing fields. Cheats should be dealt with harshly as we all want to know that the best players can do what they do because of their natural talent, not because of what animal hormone or growth serum their dealer is shooting them up with. But it is the baseball authorities that should be most appalled by this. They have repeatedly dropped the ball on the issue of steroids for the last decade. They clearly have no grasp at all on how to stop people from cheating, how to punish them, even how to keep some test results under wraps! They have been a shambles. Apparently Bud Selig, the commissioner, gets like $17 million a year which is a f*cking disgrace. If I was A-Rod I would be suing the MLB for loss of future earnings because he has not been punished by them, and wont be, but he will be hung in the court of public opinion. I have no time for drug cheats but I have even less time for incompetence and stupidity and the MLB have been both.
What do people expect? Baseball is clearly, and has been for some time, riddled with players who have used steroids to enhance their abilities. Like a superhero power but one that makes your dick shrivel up. It is no surprise that people want to be stronger, quicker, recover faster from injury, these things can make the difference between $5 and $20 million a year. And don't get me started on homers, we all know that chicks dig the long ball.
Rodriguez should be upset with himself. He was arguably the best player in baseball and lots of people adore him (lots of people also hate him and they are licking their lips about this revelation) and he will no doubt lose some of his endorsements, fans, and a surefire place in the Hall of Fame. But he must be pissed with the MLB. The results of the test he failed were supposed to be anonymous and A-Rod was tested (alongside 103 other players) just so that the authorities would know the percentages of players using. No one was supposed to be punished!
But now A-Rod will be punished. He should lose some credibility because I think that sports should be played on even playing fields. Cheats should be dealt with harshly as we all want to know that the best players can do what they do because of their natural talent, not because of what animal hormone or growth serum their dealer is shooting them up with. But it is the baseball authorities that should be most appalled by this. They have repeatedly dropped the ball on the issue of steroids for the last decade. They clearly have no grasp at all on how to stop people from cheating, how to punish them, even how to keep some test results under wraps! They have been a shambles. Apparently Bud Selig, the commissioner, gets like $17 million a year which is a f*cking disgrace. If I was A-Rod I would be suing the MLB for loss of future earnings because he has not been punished by them, and wont be, but he will be hung in the court of public opinion. I have no time for drug cheats but I have even less time for incompetence and stupidity and the MLB have been both.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
'cause I'm the taxman....
What is it with these adverts on the TV for law firms that can get your tax debt reduced? I don't understand how this set up works. The clients get themselves into tax debt, I can only assume by not paying the taxes that they owe. So they have a debt, according to these adverts sometimes as much as $500,000! What these lawyers seem to do is settle these debts for pennies on the dollar. The debtors end up paying off like 20% of the total debt.
Now I understand that sometimes creditors will accept a reduced figure just to settle, this is business so OK. But these people OWE MONEY! THEY HAVE TO PAY TAXES! Everyone else does, unless you are set for a position in the Obama administration (I don't blame Obama for this though, the honeymoon continues!). If these debts have grown so high because of unreasonable penalties and fees I am fine with these being reduced but the amount of taxes owed shouldn't change. People shouldn't be able to avoid paying their taxes only to pay a reduced sum at a later date, that is not right! Taxes, although annoying and somewhat high, are necessary and improve the world in which we live. So pay up people! OK rant over!
Aren't puppies cute...
Now I understand that sometimes creditors will accept a reduced figure just to settle, this is business so OK. But these people OWE MONEY! THEY HAVE TO PAY TAXES! Everyone else does, unless you are set for a position in the Obama administration (I don't blame Obama for this though, the honeymoon continues!). If these debts have grown so high because of unreasonable penalties and fees I am fine with these being reduced but the amount of taxes owed shouldn't change. People shouldn't be able to avoid paying their taxes only to pay a reduced sum at a later date, that is not right! Taxes, although annoying and somewhat high, are necessary and improve the world in which we live. So pay up people! OK rant over!
Aren't puppies cute...
Friday, February 6, 2009
Things that make me go hmmmm...(part 2)
Today I had to run some errands for the production company. I was zipping up and down the streets and avenues of NYC like I owned the place, I don't however...I think Donald Trump does. Along the way some things caught my eye/s.
Octo-mum - this is the story of the woman in California who has just given birth to octuplets, in addition to the six other kids she already has! Maybe it is the comic book geek within but I was disappointed when I found out the truth because I thought that there was a women out there with eight limbs, which I thought was cool. Like Doctor Octopus from Spiderman. Or a normal octopus.
Gladiator shoes - walking past a shoe store window I saw those god awful strappy shoes that have become the trend. If I had walked into Prada or Ralph Lauren four years ago and said "gladiator shoes, think about it" I would have been escorted out of the fashion show. Who convinced the manufacturers that skinny girls out there wanted to dress up like Spartacus? And what is worse is that they do! They do want to look like a roman centurion. I hear togas are the must wear item in '09.
What does change smell like? - walking past some street merchants selling knock off cologne and perfume (think Huge Buss and Kevin Kline No 1) I saw one scent with President Obama emblazoned across the box with The Stars and Stripes in the background. It was called Change. I imagine that this smells like a mixture of new puppy, fresh laundry and unicorn farts. I bet that Republicans are hoping it quite quickly begins to smell like disappointment and "I told you so".
Multiple-personality disorder issues - seeing a poster for Toni Collette's new show, The United States of Tara, about a mother with multiple personality disorder, made me think it must be very difficult to plan ahead with this illness. Like with laundry, if you don't know who is turning up tomorrow how do you know what clothes need to be washed? Does one personality know about the other ones? Does they operate on a roster system? Logistically this must be very hard on all concerned. In Tara one of the personalities is male, does the husband still get to have sex with his wife who is still, by the laws of science, a vagina club member? This must be very taxing. I think that multiple-personality disorder sufferers would make Wife Swap more interesting.
Octo-mum - this is the story of the woman in California who has just given birth to octuplets, in addition to the six other kids she already has! Maybe it is the comic book geek within but I was disappointed when I found out the truth because I thought that there was a women out there with eight limbs, which I thought was cool. Like Doctor Octopus from Spiderman. Or a normal octopus.
Gladiator shoes - walking past a shoe store window I saw those god awful strappy shoes that have become the trend. If I had walked into Prada or Ralph Lauren four years ago and said "gladiator shoes, think about it" I would have been escorted out of the fashion show. Who convinced the manufacturers that skinny girls out there wanted to dress up like Spartacus? And what is worse is that they do! They do want to look like a roman centurion. I hear togas are the must wear item in '09.
What does change smell like? - walking past some street merchants selling knock off cologne and perfume (think Huge Buss and Kevin Kline No 1) I saw one scent with President Obama emblazoned across the box with The Stars and Stripes in the background. It was called Change. I imagine that this smells like a mixture of new puppy, fresh laundry and unicorn farts. I bet that Republicans are hoping it quite quickly begins to smell like disappointment and "I told you so".
Multiple-personality disorder issues - seeing a poster for Toni Collette's new show, The United States of Tara, about a mother with multiple personality disorder, made me think it must be very difficult to plan ahead with this illness. Like with laundry, if you don't know who is turning up tomorrow how do you know what clothes need to be washed? Does one personality know about the other ones? Does they operate on a roster system? Logistically this must be very hard on all concerned. In Tara one of the personalities is male, does the husband still get to have sex with his wife who is still, by the laws of science, a vagina club member? This must be very taxing. I think that multiple-personality disorder sufferers would make Wife Swap more interesting.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Internship
Tomorrow is my second day at my internship at a New York television production company. Thank you, I know what you are thinking "well done Olly, you are a legend, we love you", but before you get carried away the internship is only two days a week and it is unpaid. Yes unpaid! I know the economy is tough but yes there are jobs out there that don't even pay a thing, not even one dime.
This is because the job is in media. An industry that collectively generates billions of dollars yearly, and the company I am with seems to be doing a nice line in TV shows, movies and other digital entertainment. And yet they can't throw anything my way, not a travel stipend or even a free biscuit (I get free tea and coffee but as of yet no biscuits). I can't bemoan this scenario though, it is exactly what I am looking for. I am playing the game, you need to start at the bottom of the ladder and hope that you can grab the lowest rung and pull yourself up. So this is what I have to do. It looks like in the weeks to come I will be able to go on some shoots and hopefully I will be able to acquire some skills that enable me to get paid for work, the sooner the better!
This is because the job is in media. An industry that collectively generates billions of dollars yearly, and the company I am with seems to be doing a nice line in TV shows, movies and other digital entertainment. And yet they can't throw anything my way, not a travel stipend or even a free biscuit (I get free tea and coffee but as of yet no biscuits). I can't bemoan this scenario though, it is exactly what I am looking for. I am playing the game, you need to start at the bottom of the ladder and hope that you can grab the lowest rung and pull yourself up. So this is what I have to do. It looks like in the weeks to come I will be able to go on some shoots and hopefully I will be able to acquire some skills that enable me to get paid for work, the sooner the better!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Things that make me go hmmmm...
How long before you need your hair to look good should you get a haircut? You get your haircut and it looks great that day, the professional you are paying (unless your get your haircut by your Mum for free, a Mum who is not a hairdresser) has put gel/wax/hairspray on it and has styled it up nice. Then for a period of days after you get the haircut you can't get it looking anything like t did when you left the salon. But then one day, and I think your hair needs a week, it has grown out just enough and you look good. I think there should be some university studies to calculate the exact time needed because we all know maths solves stuff.
Is graffiti frowned upon because the sentiments are usually negative? Graffiti can be so rude, like "We hate Dave, he sucks. Call his Mom on 555...". Would we have such an issue with public defacement if it said "Dave is a legend, he helps kids with dyslexia. We love Dave"?
Would being turned into a vampire be so bad? You would get bitten but you would still be you, just you with a thirst for blood. Unlike being turned into a zombie, rage sufferer or werewolf, you don't get too mashed up. Some people even find vampirism sexual but you don't get turned on by zombies (well you certainly shouldn't). Zombie love would be like having sex with a dead leper who wants to eat you.
Is it necessary for the victims of horror movie killers to be gorgeous? Would we not watch these films if the cast was not rammed with eye candy? Is it a schadenfreude thing? Would we not enjoy seeing normal looking people being butchered, maybe we would be too upset by that and wouldn't come back for the inevitable sequels. Maybe it is like animals in films? I will see humans being blown up, murdered and killed in myriad of ways and not bat an eyelid. But harm one hair on the head of a cute animal and I am crying like an Oscar winner going through a messy divorce.
Is graffiti frowned upon because the sentiments are usually negative? Graffiti can be so rude, like "We hate Dave, he sucks. Call his Mom on 555...". Would we have such an issue with public defacement if it said "Dave is a legend, he helps kids with dyslexia. We love Dave"?
Would being turned into a vampire be so bad? You would get bitten but you would still be you, just you with a thirst for blood. Unlike being turned into a zombie, rage sufferer or werewolf, you don't get too mashed up. Some people even find vampirism sexual but you don't get turned on by zombies (well you certainly shouldn't). Zombie love would be like having sex with a dead leper who wants to eat you.
Is it necessary for the victims of horror movie killers to be gorgeous? Would we not watch these films if the cast was not rammed with eye candy? Is it a schadenfreude thing? Would we not enjoy seeing normal looking people being butchered, maybe we would be too upset by that and wouldn't come back for the inevitable sequels. Maybe it is like animals in films? I will see humans being blown up, murdered and killed in myriad of ways and not bat an eyelid. But harm one hair on the head of a cute animal and I am crying like an Oscar winner going through a messy divorce.
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